Hedgehog Cheese Ball

You see these all over pinterest and some definitely look better than others.  I think mine is pretty successful because I made the face small and used slivered almonds for the quills instead of sliced/whole. The recipe I used for the cheese ball itself I modified from Amy Sedaris's book, "I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence", which is one of my go-to books when I need party help.  I rewrote the directions in my own words because I found hers to be a bit too vague.

Cheese Ball (base):
1 stick of butter*
1 8-oz package of cream cheese*
1 1/2 cups of shredded cheddar*
2 tablespoons grated onion
fresh ground black pepper to taste

first combine the butter and cream cheese.  if you decide to use a standmixer (recommended), use the paddle attachment. if you like to live life on the edge, you can probably get away with a spoon but it will a lot more work.  After the butter and cream cheese are thoroughly combined, add in the shredded cheese, grated onion, and pepper and stir until everything appears to be evenly distributed throughout the cheese.

To make the hedgehog, you'll need:
serving platter
cheese ball base (recipe above)
plastic wrap
3 whole black peppercorns
hella slivered almonds
fresh ground black pepper to taste
a few sprigs of rosemary

1. Get out the dish you intend to serve the cheeseball on.  Choose wisely because you can't change your mind later.
2. Dump your cheese mixture into the middle of the plate, forming a mound.  Use a rubber spatula to scrape the sides of the bowl so nothing goes to waste.
3. Drape a small sheet of plastic wrap over the cheese mound and shape it into a short, fat teardrop. Make sure it's all smooth, no cracks or dips.  Once you've got it shaped up nice you can discard the plastic wrap.
4. On the pointed end of the teardrop, arrange the three peppercorns to make the eyes and nose (see picture).
5. About an inch back from the eyes, start sticking in the slivered almonds.  Try to use just the longer pieces of almond and stick them in about half-way so they're sturdy. It's easy if you go in rows and then go back to fill in the gaps with any extra slivers.
6. Grind some pepper over the top of the cheese ball, but make sure not to get any on the face.
7. Use a paper towel or napkin to wipe up any mess around the plate. Place the rosemary on the plate, however you like it.
8. Get a new sheet of plastic wrap and lightly drape it over the plate (don't make it tight against the quills or they'll get messed up.)
9. Refrigerate until ready to serve.
10. When ready to serve, put out some crackers and/or vegetables cut into matchsticks either around the edge of the serving plate or on another plate to be placed nearby. Be sure to have a cheese knife near or on the platter as well.

TIPS:
~don't make the face or body too flat or long or it will look like a gross rat.
~try to place the slivered almonds close together and use as many as possible.  sparse quills will look lazy.
~keep in mind that, if you do it right, it will take a very long time to make so don't put it off until the last minute or you'll still be putting in quills while your guests arrive.
~don't just leave the cheese knife stabbed into the cheese ball when you go to serve it. unless ritual animal slaughter is part of your party theme, then go ahead.  but otherwise, leave the knife on the side of the plate.

***Good brands for nondairy substitutes: Earth Balance (butter), Tofutti (cream cheese), Daiya (cheddar cheese).***